domingo, 12 de julio de 2015

Internal Mechanisms Govern Our thinking

Fortunately, I have a day off, off school, off work. I am panning everything I want to do today. This day is going to be about me relaxing and taking a deep breath. I am not planning to worry about anything or anybody. However, the minute I have this idea, my head starts working and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Why did I have to say that out loud? There is a possibility that I unconsciously knew this was going to happen or maybe it is the result of my realizing and breathing fresh air. I do not know but I hope to find out.

Most dictionaries define reflection as inner thinking or contemplation. There are different types of reflection or rather there are different topics one can reflect on. But it may seem rather obvious that when one does have the time to reflect (even when one did not plan on doing it) one will not reflect on topics such as world peace or hunger; one will start reflecting on what has been ringing a bell on our minds for months. At least that is what happened to me today and I know that I was not going to be very fond of the results of this "inner thinking", not because I would be lying to be myself but quite the opposite: the truth would come out bare naked. The question is -still- why I start reflecting when it was not my idea in the first place to do so. My theory is (and unlike real theories this one is only based on my experiences) that there is a sort of internal mechanism which activated whenever one stops reflecting about what matters in one's life. This mechanism may function at inconvenient times (Exhibit A) or when one is not expecting it to work but it is a sign that some reflection is needed. "Need" may look like a strong word but it accounts for reality. What do I mean with this? I mean that every now and then I need to think about my life and what I am doing because if I do not activate that mechanism, it will activate by itself in the wrong place at the wrong time. I need reflection as I need water for living: I've found out that that is the only way can live in society as a civilized person without having to eat my insides every time something comes up that I can no longer ignore or cope with.

Unfortunately, I have a day off, off school, off work. I am planning everything I want to do today. However, the mechanism just activated itself by the idea of my free time and it seems like I will be reflecting all day. I guess it is the price I have to pay for not making the time to think when I was supposed to. I cannot do anything to stop it, that is for sure. So here we go...


martes, 28 de abril de 2015

Constraining others

         I remember a friend quoting a phrase he had read somewhere on the internet that said that people know exactly how to live other people’s lives but never their own. It’s a sensible idea, isn’t it? It’s so easy to be selfish and to demand things from others, specially things you would never ask yourself to give. And I’m not talking about material stuff, of course, but of intangible and more valuable things that could threaten or contradict how we act with others. What do I mean with this?

       Being judgemental with others for the same things we do is not so heinous in the hypocresy it embeds but on the consequences it may trigger. I’m not saying we shouldn’t acknowledge our mistakes or flaws and say “hey, my bad” from time to time (if we don’t, karma will take care of us), what I’m trying to say is that we know if our action is going to have disastrous consequences for both sides of the story and we can keep going or we can kill our pride and stop right there, if not for the others at least for ourselves. Now, this is still being selfish. As I said earlier, being self-centered is really easy. You can beat your chest and justify your actions acting like a victim of the circumstances or you can stop right there. You can give a million reasons why it’s acceptable for you to be the way you are but not for the other to be like that or you can stop right there.

        What is so terrible about just being able to stop at the right moment? Are we going to lose face or our dignity? I find it quite ridiculous to think that way and actually a bit mediocre. I strongly believe that it’s better to be that type of person that acknowledges he has made a mistake by condemning the other for something he would have done himself than the liar who pretends to be above the rest.

       You may think I’m just bluffing, that I’m bragging about how to be a better person without knowing what this implies. I won’t deny it. What I will say is that I know how bad things can get if you are stubborn enough not to budge an inch. You can end up either losing a friend (he himself actually knows who I'm talking about) or worst missing the opportunity to actually know yourself because whenever you stop right there you give yourself the opportunity to grow up, to be mature, to realise that you’re just as human and imperfect as your peer next to you. I found out that I remind myself of this everyday. There’s no such thing as taking this for granted. You take this stance and you grow up everyday a little more.

      It may be exhausting and difficult to reveal your weakness to the world but pretending to stand firmly on your own feet even when you know you’re mistaken will carry along pains you would later rather not have experienced at all.

martes, 21 de abril de 2015

Why we do what we do.

     We can feel it, right there in front of us, behind us, also around the corner. It’s almost haunting us, it’s about to get us. It’s nothing more and nothing less than that gigantic four-letter word: SALE.

     We (women) are –there’s no doubt about it- window-shopaholics. We have this huge virtual wardrobe or bookcase (for those who window shop books) in our memory to store everything we buy in our window-shopping escapades. We don’t feel embarrassed by the fact that we can stare for hours at this beautiful leather coat or that amazing trilogy of tales by our favourite author. Now, why do we do it? Why do we window-shop almost everything around us? Is it because we feel empty inside? That’s an easy answer. I think, and this is just a guess, that we do it because we’re too proud or too scared to actually purchase what we want. Again, this can be either because we care about what other people think or because we rather buy things we need than things we desire to have. 

     In my case (I’m a university student and I’m sure I speak for everyone in the same position), everytime I window-shop and I get to the point of, you know, deliberating if I can actually buy the thing, I start thinking of all the photocopies and books I need for school which cuts off any possibility of me purchasing anything at all. Here, I should say that I’m sure there’s not a definite answer of why we window-shop: It’s not that I think I don’t deserve having something I want but every penny counts, specially when you’re a student.  Still, I keep window shopping; I find pleasure on it.
Another possible answer would be that window-shopping is a cheap –actually, it’s free!- pastime. Of course we sometimes buy what we see, but the point of having all those things beautifully displayed in a window may be to own the desired object for zero money.

     I’ve also found that I unconsciously consider the time spent looking at a window, virtually shopping every item that catches our attention, as a treasured moment, almost filled with high classical music in the background, just like in the advertisements. I don’t care if it’s cold outside, if it’s raining, snowing or if it’s so hot that I could dehydrate. I always have time to do it. I need those moments of daydreaming, of believing everything is possible, including being able to buy all I see. In fact, nowadays, we don’t have to catch a cold to experience pleasure in window-shopping. We can do it online right from our home and if we want to actually buy something, we’re just one click away from doing it.

    Whatever the reasons, we don’t regret it. We find it comfortably “profitable”: we buy, except that we don’t.

domingo, 29 de marzo de 2015

Volutas de humo

Volutas de humo que flotan
Alrededor de mi cuerpo
Con que simpleza se desintegran
En cuanto las toca el viento
Conversar, conversar con vos quisiera
Decirte, decirte lo que yo siento...
¿Por qué siempre te necesito
Cuánto más solo me encuentro?
Éste, éste, tu encanto fatal
Es lo único que no entiendo
Sabiendo que, poco a poco
Mi vida estás consumiendo...
Cigarrillo forrado de blanco
El color de la pureza y,
¿Qué llevás en el alma? Lo negro...
¡Cuántos somos los que nos aferramos
A tus pitadas profundas y exhalamos de una vez!


miércoles, 18 de febrero de 2015

Is it really?

Surveillance: Society vs. Governments
Many governments intrude into people’s data without their explicit consent, they claim that they do it for a valid purpose: national security. However, we must ask ourselves how far should the government be allowed to go in the name of public safety; we need to have reasonable boundaries and strict control of what they do in matter of surveillance.
A clear example of an uncontrolled mass surveillance system is Russia. President Vladimir Putin has claimed: “You have to get a court permission to stalk someone. We don’t have a massive system for interceptions. It cannot exist.” He supports his view by saying that their special services are strictly controlled by society and by their law. Nonetheless, it has been proven that many times warrants are not required by telecom agencies to intercept people’s communications, strict control is non-existent. In my opinion, secret services must be rigorously supervised by the legislature in order to avoid injustice and guarantee the pursuance of law.
The National Security Agency of the United States (NSA) tracks phone records from citizens. According to them, a warrant is needed  and must be approved by the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court in order to stalk phone calls and relevant data about them. I believe that these organizations are always hiding information from the public eye and it should be mandatory to reveal every aspect of their investigation to people involved in them.
                It is worth noting that surveillance has always existed even though there were no technological resources. For example, in Argentina during the last dictatorship, the military managed to invade society’s privacy stating that they were assuring public safety. They collected personal information of certain people such as occupation, political ideology, location, and “suspicious” behaviour. I believe State terrorism is not the appropriate way to protect a nation, since it represents a violation of the civil liberties. Instead, countries should ask for citizens’ opinion to reach an agreement on what degree of surveillance a country must have.

As seen before, governments tend to invade people’s lives with the pretext of preserving National Security. Notwithstading, these interventions should be made only when it is absolutely necessary and with strict control of State organizations. Only by considering the facts mentioned before, we will be able to preserve our intimacy and dignity which are part of our civil rights.

(Popurrí facultativo!)

jueves, 5 de febrero de 2015

¿Quién dice que es fácil?

Este año empiezo mi cuarto/quinto año de facultad y ya empiezan las crisis. Ese camino donde sentís que ya no te falta tanto para terminar pero al mismo tiempo sentís que no terminás nunca. Cansa. Todo te hunde en un vaso de agua y vos misma son la principal responsable de que eso ocurra. Ya es febrero y empiezo a preparar finales lo cual ayuda a acelerar las crisis que se presentan todos los años. Haber estado enero de vacaciones y encontrarte con que con solo 30 días perdiste el ritmo es bastante impresionante. Te sentás a estudiar y querés ahorcar al que tenés al lado, respirar profundo te toma un laburo enorme y lo único que querés es escapar pero sabés que te quedan 8 horas de estudio (de horas-culo no vamos a mentir) por delante. Cuando hablás con alguien que te dice que todo va a pasar le querés pasar un aplanadora por encima (aunque sabés que en el fondo tiene razón, que en diez días vas a estar bárbara tomándote unos mates y con todo el ritmo encima) porque no te comprende. Por el contrario, buscás a la persona que está en la misma situación que vos y te empapás de esas malas vibras que te permiten estar más de dos horas al lado de una persona aunque te intoxiques. Todo pasa, esto también. El problema es cuándo y cómo porque ya es infumable la etapa en que querés destruir tu casa, hacer un asado con tus apuntes o llorar hasta que te estalle la cabeza. ¿Todo pasa?

jueves, 29 de enero de 2015

No te salves

 No te quedes inmóvil
al borde del camino
no congeles el júbilo
no quieras con desgana
no te salves ahora
ni nunca
no te salves
no te llenes de calma

no reserves del mundo
sólo un rincón tranquilo
no dejes caer los párpados
pesados como juicios

no te quedes sin labios
no te duermas sin sueño
no te pienses sin sangre
no te juzgues sin tiempo

pero si
pese a todo
no puedes evitarlo
y congelas el júbilo
y quieres con desgana

y te salvas ahora
y te llenas de calma
y reservas del mundo
sólo un rincón tranquilo
y dejas caer los párpados
pesados como juicios
y te secas sin labios
y te duermes sin sueño
y te piensas sin sangre
y te juzgas sin tiempo
y te quedas inmóvil
al borde del camino
y te salvas
no te quedes conmigo.